While going virtual...

Marc is sick...

i'm sure he'll get over it, but while his temperature is still up
and fit of coughs send his small frame violently shaking...
i'm beside myself with worry.

Atleast, he's not had an asthma attack (yey! to Montelukast
and Seretide and thanks! to Dra. Ninang Lanie )...that would've
been the straw that will break this horse's back!

And i only have 2 kids...how did my parents manage with 7?

If i may be allowed a moment of weakness...

April 8, 2010 is the date when i experienced my first broken heart...

the first man i loved...kissed...hugged...hated...adored...took care of...

left

although it's been years since we've been skirting the issue of goodbyes,
nothing ever prepared me to face the actual loss.

what would i give if i can be given just a minute to be with him...
to hold his hand again...tell him how much i love him, miss him.

he should never have left like that...one moment well then the next...

gone

im sorry i didn't hold your hand more, i never told you how much
i love you when things were still breezy...and how terribly i'd miss
you when your'e gone...

this is the toughest challenge of my life right now...acceptance

successes that i can't share with you
activities that we wont be doing
places that we won't be seeing

i will never forget you, 35 years we've spent together is something
that even a lifetime won't be able to erase.

"See you tomorrow" were the words that we last shared...
a promise that never happened.

I guess "See you soon" would have been more appropriate...
but who could've known?

I love you Papa...i miss you.

Family Milestone

Roll of Successful Examinees in the
NURSE LICENSURE EXAMINATION
Held on NOVEMBER 29 & 30, 2008 Page:290 of 791
Released on FEBRUARY 18, 2009

...
14420 ESCANDOR, FRANCIS GREFALDA
14421 ESCANDOR, IRISH ANNE SANTIAGO
14422 ESCANER, MARY GRACE QUANICO
14423 ESCANER, STELLA GONO
14424 ESCANILLA, MA FATIMA TAPAYAN
14425 ESCANLAR, CHERRY MAE GANZA
14426 ESCANLAR, RISSA GENN RONQUILLO
14427 ESCANO, RIA ASUELO ...

Congratulations Faith! We're all proud of you!

I wish i knew

How long does it take to know a person
Well enough
To know when she loves you
The way you are and expect nothing in return?

How long should you be with her to know that
she’s is quiet when she’s happy
she’s restless when disturbed
she’s sad most of the time but doesn’t show it
the world has problems enough on its own.

Did you know that most people hate her for her insensitiveness
But holds her tongue so as not to hurt your feelings?
Whenever did she make you feel inadequate?
Although the fingers on her hands are not enough to count
The things that she hates about you and the things that she wishes you were more of.

She’s not perfect, that she is most aware of.
Many a things she is not
Sweet
Gentle
Meek
Friendly
Patient
Traits you might want her more to be…but is not.

But are the words loyal, sincere, ally, friend, confidant mean anything to you?

Tell You Something

Get so caught up everyday
trying to keep it all together
While the time just slips away
I know nothing last forever

Imagine there was no tomorrow
Imagine that I couldn’t see your face
There’d be no limit to my sorrow
So all I can say is

I want to tell you something
Give you something
Show you in so many ways
‘Cause it would all mean nothing
If I don’t say something
Before it all blows away

Don’t want to wait to bring you flowers
Wait another hour
Let alone another day
I want to tell you something
Show you something
Won’t wait till its too late

Just a simple conversation
Just a moment is all it takes
I want to be here just to listen
And I don’t want to hesitate

Imagine there was no tomorrow
Imagine that I couldn’t see your face
There’d be no limit to my sorrow
‘Cause there is nothing that could fill that space
Ohh, did I put it off for too long?
I didn’t say all that I have to say
I want to take the time to right the wrong
Before we get to that place

Just lean on my shoulder, it’s not over till its over
Don’t worry ‘bout it,
cause I’m going to make sure our bond gets stronger
I don’t want to wait until the storm, when something’s wrong
and now you’re gone
And I can’t find you

the person whom Alicia Keys dedicated this song to must've been someone really special...
if had the talent i would've written this for my husband, my dad, my mom...

...I love you...

Turning into The Devil...not in Prada

Those who watched the Anne Hathaway-starred flick know that its message is directed to workaholic females unintentionally blurring the lines between work and personal life.

I've realized that i am committing the same mistake...dangerously tittering over the edge...

In the movie, Andy, our heroine became so deeply absorbed in her new job that it caused her to split with her boyfriend and distanced herself from her friends. Work became her world, her security, work stress is her excuse for every thoughtless action or word towards others around her.

I am guilty...i've been inconsiderate to my husband...i've been insensitive to my parent's needs...

She almost became a Miranda-clone (the Devil), thankfully towards the end of the movie she realized that she doesn't want to be like her. That kind of life is not for her, Andy is not like Miranda. There are other things in her life that are more important.

Today, I have realized that I am slowly turning into a devil through two email messages from friends...thanks to Pamy and Grace...i have become aware...i'm enlightened

"The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank...these create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. "

"Pagpasensyahan mo sana kung madalas, ako'y masungit, dala na marahil ito ng katandaan.
Pagtanda mo, maiintindihan mo rin."

I vow to recover from my mistakes, I promise to find the will to turn away from work when I need to, I will declare that my time with family and friends are holy and should be respected.

I'm One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest!

Jeez...not only am i so intrigued by the book and the movie...

If i were a book, I'm One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest!by Ken Kesey.

You're crazy. This has led people to attempt to confine you to a safe place so that you don't pose a danger to yourself or others. You feel like you pose a great danger to the man (or maybe the woman) or whatever else is keeping you down. But most of the time, you just end up being observed. Were you crazy before you were confined?

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